The end. 

Please don’t proceed if you are triggered by self harm, suicide or eating disorders. 
I genuinely think I am going to kill myself in the next week. My family needs money to pay the bills and I’m draining any assistance I can give on treatment. I know if I don’t go to treatment then I will relapse instantly and die so I am having a hard time thinking of a reason to not just do it and be done. 

The only caveat is that my therapists at IOP know and I’m sure they’ve told my doctor and outpatient therapist so I’m not sure what I’ll do.

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